If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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