margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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