Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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