I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
