What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
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