ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
