i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize