the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
