chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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