so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Randomize
