I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
