great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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