no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
