dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
