Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Randomize
