420 ftw
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Randomize
