my soul wont recognize me after tonight
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
jump out the window naked night went bad
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