Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
