It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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