Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Randomize
