Christians are straight up FREAKS
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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