She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
