forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Randomize
