Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
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