# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
