Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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