when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
