She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
