I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
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