Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
