Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
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