Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
