Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
