Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Semen is not good for contacts.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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