with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
