i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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