yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
