i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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