Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
