I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
How does one acquire holy water?
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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