The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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