There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
