I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize
