she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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