How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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