3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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