Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
