So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
