my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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