Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
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