If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
