I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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